Ruralshire Constabulary, in common with every other police force, has a regular, glossy and quite irritating internal newspaper. For as long as anyone can remember now, the whole paper has been dedicated to stories about how successful our new policing model is.
This is strange because the ?new model?, which is hardly new now, is a spectacular and epic failure in just about any way you choose to measure it.
Each edition is packed with grinning police officers and staff, climbing over each other to praise the new system. Strangely enough, no one from Response, Tactical Reserve, Firearms (unless they are appealing for female recruits) Traffic or CID ever appears. They all seem to be from various Headquarters teams or from ?Specialist Units? you never really see on the ground.
As for the editorial preference for new model success stories, there are a number of options:
1. Everything and everyone I meet, including the public and my commanders, are wrong and the new model works well.
2. The new model does not work and the editorial team are unaware of this.
3. The new model is indeed a failure, the editorial team knows this and is steadfastly refusing to admit the same.
I think it is probably a combination of 2. and 3. above, and I have some sympathy. They cannot exactly admit that we have blown goodness knows how much taxpayer cash on something which doesn?t work.
The problem I have with all this is that we have no other overtly official publication. The staff see all these stories, which they know from personal experience are nonsense, and they either stop reading it altogether or a culture of disbelief is generated which then becomes very difficult to change.
The other day when I handed the paper out during parade, PC Mickey ?The Head? Thompson said ?Don?t read that Guv, it?s only going to wind you up?. Silver Lining? At least we don?t have a poetry competition!
Gadget Note: You might want to check out the android app Pocket FedRep ?a quick reference guide to information relating to those frequently asked questions about UK Police Regulations & Determinations?.
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